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Brittney Middleton was not looking for love when she met Ikenna Ogike, who is known as Ike, at the Couture nightclub in Los Angeles in October 2014.She had recently ended a six-year relationship with a man she had dated since attending the University of South Carolina.Ike’s family was not like that.”But they learned to understand each other, often resolving any conflicts the same day.“Ike is an uneasy guy who feels at home with Brittney because she is down-to-earth and humble,” said Obi Dukes, a groomsman. It’s a beautiful thing to watch them together.”In August 2015, Ms. The Nigerian-born Father Omeaku, a longtime family friend, explained to the guests how the wedding merged two cultures. Ogike’s cousin, flew in from Nigeria to host a rousing, dance-filled reception.Middleton complained of “feeling funny” and soon learned that she was pregnant.“This was a total shock to me because it was so soon, and I thought Brittney was on birth control,” Mr. “While we had talked about having three children after we married, I never wanted a child out of wedlock.”Ms. “We both freaked out, went through shock, grief and periods alone to think and evaluate for a couple of days,” she said. And since we were committed to each other, we resolved to make it work.”Still, telling her family was daunting. Ogike were enjoying a beachside dinner at the Grand Bahia Principe resort in Runaway Bay, Jamaica, when their waiter brought over a plate covered in a dome and removed the top to reveal a ring box and writing in chocolate that said, “Will You Marry Me? Ogike grabbed the ring, got down on his knee, and proposed: “You are carrying my child and making me the happiest person.”Before Chizarankem Emory Ogike, named for Mr. Middleton had converted from her Southern Baptist religious upbringing to his Roman Catholicism. “I am more spiritually in tune now than I was as a Baptist.”On June 17, the couple were married before 275 guests, including the flower girl, Zara, which is how their daughter is known, in a traditional religious ceremony at Holy Spirit Catholic Church on Johns Island, S. And he stressed the importance of communicating and listening to the other’s point of view. Nigerian food like stewed goat meat, jollof rice and pounded yam wraps was served along with American herb-seared Angus flat-iron steak and chicken piccata.“I grabbed my bag and left his apartment.”He entered the hospital, complaining that Ms. “I was ill and didn’t think she cared enough,” he said.“After texting each other, she came back sobbing, telling me that she was a great girl, and that I won’t ever meet anyone like her again.“That defining moment,” he continued, “was the first time I knew I would someday make her my wife.”But there were challenges to overcome. Ogike still embraced certain aspects of his Nigerian culture, like not wrapping Christmas gifts and playing down birthdays. Middleton loves birthdays.) He also speaks in the native Igbo language to his father, a retired college professor, and other family members who live in California. Middleton also noted that the Nigerian culture favored traditional roles for men and women.

Many question the wisdom of interracial dating, but actually, we seem to have an equally big problem with dating between one African culture and another. Love blinds common sense.”“No Nigerian, Ghanaian or Jamaican man is welcome in my house. Why is it better for me to be with a white man than it is to be with a Nigerian? How many marriages do you know of people from two different African countries that have lasted till old age? I pondered those phrases: “It’s for your own good” and “stick to your own”.He reminded me of a well-mannered guy from the South.”They exchanged phone numbers, and two days later, Mr.Ogike, who was ready for a relationship after years of bachelorhood, texted her.Or rather, we might date outside our own culture but when it comes to marriage we are advised to stick with “our own”. If you’re going to marry a foreigner, marry a white man.”These were the words that fell from my friend’s mother’s mouth when her daughter told her she was dating a Nigerian man because she was tired of Congolese men. ”, said my friend in response, defiantly challenging her mother, to my dismay (anybody knows better than to challenge an African mother! White people “White people don’t have much culture; it’s easy to adapt either way. Was it really for our own good to find our life partners within our own culture?As one uncle put it to me [I’m Congolese], “If you married a Nigerian, how would you cope if he wanted to retire in Nigeria? Could we really say that relationships would be easier if we were with someone of the same origin?

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