Balancing life while dating a man with children
This can be a difficult quality to find in this world of overgrown Peter Pans on the hunt for their own Mother figure—a person to handle all the less savory household duties, remind them to go to the doctor, praise them constantly, hinge their daily or long-term plans on what Pan wants or says he needs.
This situation is different, because he already takes on that role for his child while still taking decent care of himself.
Since single dads still have to, you know, fund their child, there isn't always a ton of extra dough to fund flippant outings to fancy cocktail bars or jump onto tubing trips you didn't even want to attend in the first place. " And in a more serious sense, it forces you to dissect immature impulses.
It inspires you to be more mindful of your own spending habits. Like when you're running late to meet a friend because you're stuck in a child-stuffed lantern parade one town over, you're not allowed to bitch and force your S. to help you summon an Uber to pick you up, STAT—because he's too busy pushing the kid on a skateboard inside the festivities to indulge your princess agenda.
When the relationship was brand-spankin' new, a lot of close friends lamented renditions of, "I could never DATE A PARENT." They echoed sentiments of kids being deal breakers. Everyone has a past and brings baggage into a relationship. Although, of course, I find my partner's child a deeply charming, fun, hilarious little human who doesn't qualify as "baggage." You know what I mean.
A man willing and thrilled to take on the dad role shows commitment.
Matters are so peachy that she even shared me on a Google Calendar she, her boyfriend, and my boyfriend share re: who has chief parenting duties when (it's half-and-half, really).
Nothing is a big deal unless it's an actual Big Deal.And even then, it's not like I leapt from a cake and shouted, "I AM YOUR NEW MOM!!!!!!!!!!! I'm still just a buddy who kicks it from time to time to join in on eating pizza or playing "balloon" or the occasional ride home from school.When and if my boyfriend wants to explain my role in his life to his child, that's not really up to me.Suddenly the jokes seemed a little creepy, and although I actively pumped the brakes on making them, those familiar with my menagerie of hot dad puns rose a skeptical eyebrow. Hotness aside, there's some unexpected things that happen when you date a single dad.I've dated ("dated") divorced dudes before, which might be a little similar, but this relationship marks my first with a parent.